When will the lies cease? Lie to me about Russia all you want, but don’t try to sell me a bill of coffee goods. In his first international trip as Fearless Leader, President the Trump visited Saudi Arabia on Saturday, where he was greeted with gahwa, a traditional Saudi coffee. And he went back for seconds.
According to Arab News, the Donald was met by King Salman at the Riyadh airport, where the two shared the traditional coffee service, with King Salman even teaching Trump proper Saudi etiquette for indicating when you’ve had enough:
Now, shouldn’t we all be happy that the leader of free world—a man who famously said in one of his books that he’s “never taken drugs of any kind, never had a glass of alcohol. Never had a cigarette, never had a cup of coffee”—is softening his stance on “drugs”? Granted, it has been argued that he took a “soft white” stance on illicit substances during his more sniffly presidential debates and during the election, he has been seen two-steppin’ for votes with a cup of Cuban coffee, so he’s not exactly the sort of person you’d be surprised by when he says one grandiose thing and then does another.
But no, I’m not happy about it. Pick a lane. Take a hard line or do a soft one, but not both. Don’t tell us you don’t touch the stuff and then slam down a cuppa like the $100 billion for the arms deal you just made with the Saudis is at the bottom of it. And then go back for seconds. It’s down there somewhere, let me take another look.
Who knows, maybe he was being polite, eschewing his own preferences so as to offend a country’s ruler and to work on foreign diplom… I’m sorry, I can’t even finish. We all know it’s that cool 100B. Or perhaps Trump was unduly influenced by all the all-consuming power of The Orb. That would at least be understandable.
All Hail Orb.
Zac Cadwalader is the news editor at Sprudge Media Network.
*top image via Arab News