Everything is going just fine over at Elon Musk’s Twitter. In completely unrelated news to Musk paying $44 billion for a company valued somewhere around $25 billion, the free-speech centrist very sensitive tech genius billionaire wants to know if you know anybody looking for a good deal on a Strada? Everything is fine.
As reported by Vice, there is a fire sale going on over at Twitter HQ in San Francisco, and anything not bolted to the floor can be yours for the right price. Working with auction house Heritage Global Partners, the social media company has listed more than 900 items to be put up for bid starting January 17th, after which Twitter will probably move to Texas for the taxes. Among the hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of equipment hitting the online auction floor, there is a pretty astounding amount of coffee gear.
There are no less than five espresso machines up for sale, including one three-group La Marzocco Strada, three one-group Linea EEs, and a Unic Tango automatic for good measure. But what good is an espresso machine without a grinder? Luckily, two Mazzer Super Jollys are on the chopping block as well as four BUNN grinders. And there are three FETCO CBS-2152-2-XTS double automatic coffee brewers to round out your lightly used coffee shop necessities.
There are also Eames chairs, pizza ovens, kegerators and refrigerators, ice machines, grills, fryers, smokers, cooktops, you name it. That’s like, four whole Build-Outs of Coffee in this here auction.
Now admittedly, as someone who doesn’t work in tech and thus doesn’t understand the excessive necessities of Silicon Valley office culture, just the stuff they are getting rid of seems a little over the top. Yet, given the new hotel-style furnishings installed at Twitter HQ for the not-mandatory-but-kinda-are work sleepovers, maybe getting rid of the caffeine makers was a bad idea? I’m sure Elon knows best.
Though if I could offer one piece of ever-so-slight criticism of Twitter’s fire sale, it is that I believe Elon has perhaps made the fire too real and probably failed to highlight the sale. Everything is fine.
Top image via Estas Manos Coffee Roasters