After teasing us for years with flavors like hot chocolate and pumpkin spice, at long last Peeps are set to release not one but two coffee flavored versions of their marshmallowy little birds.
Yes, Peeps, the Easter-time sugar-coated marshmallow confection created by Just Born in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania for nearly 70 years now. They are, first and foremost, exceedingly gross, a throwaway sugar pile that has inexplicably found some cultural relevance by glomming on to the nearest holiday. It’s vernal candy corn. The fact that many people believe they are better stale should tell you everything you need to know about Peeps. (Though the idea of someone having a Peeps cellar to age their mallow is weirdly attractive. “The ’15 was a good vintage. They are really starting to peak.”)
But they are also incredibly popular. Maybe it’s irony, maybe it’s nostalgia, maybe Americans just love a cheap processed sugar fix. But whatever it is, Peeps have staying power, and each year Just Born celebrates another year of Peepdom by putting out a few limited-edition flavors. Past flavors have included caramel apple, sour watermelon, fruit punch, cinnamon roll, bubblegum, pancakes and syrup, even candy corn, which again, gross. But never coffee.
Until 2022. This year, according to The Morning Call, Just Born is making up for lost time by putting out multiple different coffee-flavored varieties of Peeps. The first is known as “The Original Donut Shop Coffee Flavored Marshmallow Chicks,” which is pretty self-explanatory flavor-wise, in that it is obviously “bold and flavorful,” just like your favorite brew. But the second one ups the ante, taking the Donut Shop Coffee Peep and filling it with caramel mocha. In total 25% of the eight limited editions variations are coffee-themed. Though in truth, the Tropical Burst and Sparkly Wild Berry both sound kinda tasty, were it not for the Peepsness of it all.
Believe it or not, I actually think coffee and Peeps will be good for each other. The coffee flavor will help cut through the saccharine sweetness. And what about plopping a Peep in your pour-over if you’re looking to add a little sweetness to your brew? Hot chocolate has marshmallows and tea has tea pets, why can’t coffee have something fun like those, all rolled into one? Just think about it, a little sugary baby bird buddy floating on top of your coffee, wading in your Wush Wush, sweetening it up all the while. Doesn’t that sound adorable and fun and also terrible in a Peepsian sort of way?
Peeps Original Donut Shop Coffee Flavored Marshmallow Chicks and The Original Donut Shop Caramel Mocha Flavored Filled Delights are available for a limited time online or wherever you buy your Peeps.
Zac Cadwalader is the managing editor at Sprudge Media Network and a staff writer based in Dallas. Read more Zac Cadwalader on Sprudge.