Hate is a powerful aphrodisiac. I don’t know if that’s actually true, but it sounds cool so let’s run with it. A new dating app called Hater matches people not on shared interests but on shared disinterests. Users can choose from over 3,000 things they hate and the app will match them with someone similarly spiteful. With all this hata (that’s hate data), researchers at Hater compiled a map of most hated foods by state, and as it turns out, Washington State hates Keurig K-Cups the most.
That’s right. According to the Huffington Post, K-Cups are a food and Washington hates them more than anything else approximating food. In fact, another HuffPo article shows that K-Cups are the most hated thing by Washingtonians, joining the ranks of most-hated along with the New York Times, Seinfeld, porn (sure, Utah, sure), anal sex, and bloggers (and fuck you right back, Indiana).
And K-Cups aren’t the only hated coffee items; Pennsylvania hates chai lattes and Montana hates pumpkin spice anything. In a small glimmer of hope, Maryland hates cheap coffee, though that somehow appeared as the state’s most hated item but not its most hated food item even though we’ve already established K-Cups qualify as food. It’s complicated, I guess.
Other things people should feel ashamed of themselves for hating include: La Croix, kombucha, and dim sum. How?!? Dim sum is like, a million foods. Are you saying you don’t like a million foods? If you live in Nevada, Arizona, or Idaho, respectively, you are a monster—gastronomically speaking—and you don’t deserve to find love. That may be a little too far, I know, but also maybe it isn’t.
So if you’ve been looking for love in all the wrong places and want to try finding happiness in mutual disgust, then maybe give Hater a try. Just remember to hide that Keurig machine before you bring a date back to your place.
Be on the lookout for my new coffee hate-date app, Froth, where baristas can match to other baristas based upon roasters and cafes they dislike. Because 90% of working in coffee is talking shit about other coffee companies.
Zac Cadwalader is the news editor at Sprudge Media Network.