If at this point you have a problem with people liking avocado toast, then you need to reexamine your life and fix yourself. Sure, it’s ubiquitous and yes, many places offer a poor version of this exquisitely simple dish, but that doesn’t make it the reason why Millennials can’t buy houses or whatever it is they are/aren’t doing that’s got everyone so rootin’ tootin’ mad.

ASIDE: There’s no excuse for bad avocado toast; it’s actually quite simple. Slice a thick piece of hearty sourdough, toast it on a high heat until golden brown (so the outside has a good crunch and the inside is still bready and delicious), fresh smash about half an avocado (not too ripe) so that it is still chunky, spread it on the toast, and finish with some fresh-ground sea salt. I wouldn’t be mad about a little fresh-crack pepper, a sprinkling of dukkah, lime zest, a poached egg, some crumbly cheese, or any number of other delicious accoutrements, but the avocado toast requires nothing further.

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With all that out of the way, an article in SFGate posits that the Australian cafe staple may not be an import at all. By looking through old San Francisco papers, SFGate uncovered multiple recipes for avocado toast dating back over 100 years. One recipe in the Daily Alta California goes all the way back to 1885 and calls for “avocado pears” to be quartered with a silver knife. How fancy.

But what’s the big deal? An old recipe doesn’t mean that Australia isn’t the origination point of the dish as they claim it to be, right? Well, Australia wasn’t even a country until 1901, according to the article. So inasmuch as anyone can be credited for being the originator of putting a thing on a piece of bread, we can say with all assurance that the first person to do so was not, technically, Australian.

So, sorry Australia: not unlike the pavlova and the flat white, you’ve been co-opting another country’s delicacy all along (and until shown otherwise, I’m going to be a complete homer and assume that America is the birthplace of avocado toast). I understand this must come as unwelcome news to you. But just know that, as cultural descendants of the creator of avocado toast, we Americans want to personally thank you for popularizing our country’s cuisine in your cafes. Without your dogged efforts, this very American dish may have been lost forever. We cannot thank you enough.


America, the birth place of Avocado Toast.

Zac Cadwalader is the news editor at Sprudge Media Network.

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