You know those coffees that are, like, double coffees? Well now there’s one that’s 80. It’s called the Ass Kicker (because, you know, it’ll kick your ass with caffeine or something) and Munchies reports that it contains around 80 times the caffeine of a shot of espresso, or to put it in toxicological terms, about half a lethal dose.

The Ass Kicker was created by a barista at Viscous Coffee in Adelaide, Australia, and basically sounds like a “no you drink it” dare from a teenage boy. According to Munchies:

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The Ass Kicker iced coffee is comprised of a quad shot of espresso, four ice cubes made from 48-hour cold drip, and 120 milliliters of extra-aged ten-day cold brew. The whole thing is topped off with four more 48-hour cold brew ice cubes.

All these hot, cold, and iced brews are said to combine for around 5,000 milligrams of caffeine, which is roughly 4,940 milligrams more than the very pedestrian 60 in a shot of espresso. Munchies notes that while there’s no widely accepted maximum caffeine dosage, scientists speculate that around 10 grams could kill a person, though there have been instances of folks dying from less.

But before we all go out and start buying these Costco-esque bulk caffeine dispensers, it should be noted that such grandiose claims about caffeine content are notoriously dubious. Doing a little reverse engineering here, there are four shots of espresso and eight cold brew ice cubes, which are said to each contain a little over two shots. So we’ll say the eight ice cubes equal 20 shots. We’re at 24 now. That means that the 120ml of 10 day cold brew has to equal around 56 shots of espresso, or 3,360 milligrams of caffeine. Seems unlikely.

So, caveat emptor, which also sounds like what would happen to your bowels after consuming one of these things.

Zac Cadwalader is the news editor at Sprudge Media Network.

*top image via Morbotron

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