News broke earlier today that JAB Holdings, the coffee world’s version of Madrigal Electromotive, will purchase beloved American obesity merchants Krispy Kreme Doughnuts.
Here is an official ranking of all the doughnut offerings at Krispy Kreme:
1. The original Krispy Kreme doughnut, fresh from the oven.
2. The original Krispy Kreme doughnut, pre-packed in a box.
69. All the rest of their buster-ass doughnuts.
This has been an official ranking of all the doughnuts at Krispy Kreme.
Jordan Michelman is a co-founder and editor at Sprudge. His doughnut opinions do not speak for all at Sprudge Media Network.