Itโs hard out there for a person of means on a grand-scale ego trip, a lesson one Howard Schultz had to learn the hard way. The former Starbucks CEOโs will-they-or-wonโt-they relationship with a presidential candidacy bid appears to have found its answer: he wonโt.
Schultz made wavesโangry waves, so very angryโin January when he announced that he was โseriously consideringโ possibly maybe thinking about, if it wouldnโt be too much trouble, looking into a presidential bid as a โcentrist independent.โ Shockingly enough, the announcement and subsequent potential bid never gained a footing. Over the course of the last four months, no one has had Schultzโs back, even his own back. And now Eater reports Schultz has โlet go most of his campaign teamโ and won’t be campaigning over the summer while he’s recovering from back surgery. This is not to say that Schultz presidential dreams are completely dead; a final decision on his candidacy wonโt be made until after Labor Day, but by then heโll be too far behind other candidates that surely he wouldnโt considerโฆ oh thatโs right, heโs too good for the Democratic Party. Thereโs still time for him to fuck it up, I guess.
Say what you will about Howard Schultz, but he was able to unite the country; he got everyone, progressive and conservative alike, to be deeply annoyed together at his ersatz candidacy. Personally Iโm a little bummed to hear heโs most likely already done, because it deprives Sprudge of a plethora of mockery-based content over the coming months, and I was going to kick start my coffee lifestyle brand with some super-sweet anti-Schultz merch.
If he does decide to run, Iโll be taking pre-orders.
Zac Cadwaladerย is the managing editor at Sprudge Media Network and a staff writer based in Dallas.ย Read more Zac Cadwaladerย on Sprudge.
Top image by Elaine Thompson/AP via ABC News