Convenience is the real nightmare.

A recent article by ComputerWorld describes a real world scarier than any Halloween coffee fiction, one where coffee machines attack. Itโ€™s not all coffee machines mind you, just the ones that are fed after midnight (by โ€œfedโ€ I mean โ€œconnected to the internetโ€ and by โ€œafter midnightโ€ I mean โ€œat any time of the dayโ€). According to the article, these devices can be hacked to devastating effect.

Remember that massive internet outage a few weeks ago? Well, it turns out it was caused by a large-scale distributed denial-of-service (DDoS) on an estimated 100,000 internet-attached appliances โ€“ washing machines, refrigerators, coffee makers, etc. โ€“ that were hacked to basically gunk up all the world wide webโ€™s 1โ€™s and 0โ€™s, bringing it to a crippling standstill. According to the article, the cyber-attack is โ€œthought to be the first DoS attack to rely overwhelmingly on a lot of โ€˜dumbโ€™ appliances that have little processing power of their own but are connected to the internet.โ€

advert but first coffee cookbook now available

 

And more than just strength in numbers, a single hacked device can cause massive amounts of individual damage. A coffee maker, for instance, could be โ€œhackedโ€ โ€“ though most of the cyber espionage comes in the form of hackers taking advantage of the fact that most users donโ€™t change the factory default user name and passwords of โ€œadminโ€ and โ€œ1234โ€ on their devices โ€“ and could be overloaded, causing it to catch fire and leading to thousands of dollars in property damage. Itโ€™s like Maximum Overdrive meets Hackers, but for really dumb appliances that have no businesses being connected to the internet to begin with.

Thatโ€™s how the machines get us. We get all fat and happy on convenience and then BOOM! They turn on us. The next thing you know weโ€™re in some 28 Days Later-like hellish apocalypse where no one remembers how to use a kettle or grind coffee. Thatโ€™s why Iโ€™m sticking to manual brews. My home has never been under siege by my Bona Vita variable temperature kettle. Except for that one time the dog-sitter tried to use it to heat water on the gas stove, but that wasnโ€™t the kettleโ€™s fault. It was my fault for trusting the wrong person.

13511014_10107796285173890_7194431882681991935_n

Zac Cadwaladerย is the news editor at Sprudge Media Network.

*Top image via Psycho. Bottom image regrettably from Zac Cadwalader’s kitchen.

banner advertising the book new rules of coffee