Real Simple Magazine Hates Small Businesses

Real Simple Magazine Hates Small Businesses

Real Simple, a magazine for the non-fat banana smoothie probiotic yoga set, has aimed its up-do poof crosshairs directly at coffee shops. The abuse of complimentary condiments is nothing new, and has been talked to death by the industry, but srsly, Real Simple is actually advising their readers to steal. We think this is Real Stupid, and who does it hurt the most? It’s the mom & pops, the Josh and Jamie independent cafes who feel the pinch in their bi-weekly milk bills, from fine local farms like MOO-ville Dairy, Rhody Fresh, Udderly Utica, Boise Bovine, COW-lifornia Milk Co., Sunshine Dairy, Battenkill Farms, Jersey Jerseys, Thank Goodness It’s Guernsey, and Hackensack Holsteins.

It’s like going to a Mexican restaurant, ordering horchata, drinking horchata and filling the empty cup at the salsa bar. If crapazines like Real Simple keep publishing this pulp, it won’t be long til your favorite cafes are reduced to serving cappuccinos made with MOO-santo Alternative Malks. For shame, “anonymous barista”. For shame!



  1. What’s up, its pleasant article about media print, we all know media is a enormous source of information.

  2. glass awards

    6 May

    I am really impressed along with your writing talents as smartly as with the layout in your blog. Is this a paid topic or did you modify it yourself? Anyway keep up the excellent high quality writing, it’s rare to peer a great blog like this one nowadays..

  3. greg

    3 May

    Wot? No mention of doing your laundry in the bathroom sink to save money?!?

  4. Bird

    2 May

    you guys are seriously stretching to say Real Simple hates small businesses. no where does it say “go to your local cafe, not Starbucks, and take their free milk.” the people who read Real Simple are probably the people who go to Starbucks so really, what are we losing?

    and really, Real Simple is there for the consumer, not the businesses. so they are catering to their readers needs.

    • nameAl

      2 May

      Ethics, Bird. It’s called ethics. What they posted is not ethical, not nice, and Real Stupid.

  5. We serve the cream in a small steam pitcher. We keep it in the fridge and only serve it when requested.
    Since we’re paying $30+ a gallon for real cream from a local farmer and mixing it ourselves with whole milk we can not afford much waste.

  6. Steve

    2 May

    We do NOT allow shots over ice…firstly STUPID…secondly, we already know the “ghetto iced latte” trick……we put a stop to this immediately.

  7. nameChris Deferio

    1 May

    Had a customer start sneaking a 12 cup from the espresso bar and filling it with cream then adding it over the following hour to the coffee he bought. We simply asked, next time he was in, if he would like a cup of cream on the side…he said yes and I told him I would have to charge an extra dollar. He opted for just the coffee.
    I think we may be afraid to discuss the cost of things to our customers in these situations. If we notice abuse of condiments then I see nothing wrong with folding in the cost of that into that individuals drink after discussing it with them in a non threatening very casual way. It depends on if you have a good relationship with them. I would be willing to bet that a staff who does not foster a respectful and hospitable repport with all their customers will have more frequency of this happening and a tougher time dealing with it.
    It may also be wise for coffee bars to set a limit at which they will allow the milk or cream to be free. Say like , if the customer needs half cream and half coffee then an up-charge is in order.
    Or we may just need to stop putting cream out in huge quantities.
    If people request it, give them a small pitcher on the house…if they want more…charge em.

    • Rusty Angell

      2 May

      Chris, I completely agree with the service model of the barista offering it directly to the customer from behind the bar. Taking it one step further is how giants such as McDonald’s ( I think that there is something to be learned from them about managing cash-flow and waste) are now putting the cream and sugar in folks’ coffee for them. Customers see it as a “service” and being taken care of by the barista instead of having their beloved item taken away from them.

  8. Really, devil’s advocate, that’s the best you have? A milk-greedy customer actually *costs* the business money. They are using more resources than their money covers. They’re slyly attempting to steal from the business.

    Usually someone in your position tries to find a logical response. Even invoking Ayn Rand would make more sense than what you’ve given us. Go ahead, try. Actually, let me help you out: by allowing a customer to greedily steal from the business with their ill-gotten lattes, business owners are creating future wealth which might one day support those business owners and their employees (all of whom have long lost their businesses/jobs because money kept disappearing) through personal donations. Oh hell, let’s just go with the objectivist mantra “as long as it benefits me, I don’t give a shit about you”.

    Yeah, we can still discard the Rand bullshit as, well, bullshit. However, at least it will take a few more steps than your assertion that losing more money is better for the business.

    • “They are using more resources than their money covers.”

      if that’s true for you, then you’re not charging enough for shots

      • Al

        2 May

        If you invite people to come over your home are you OK with people raiding your fridge at will?

        We don’t run an open bar. We don’t charge more for coffee to cover free milk. If you want to run your shop like that please post your address and I’m sure we will all retweet this information to the populace.

      • namedevil's john galt

        3 May

        No, I just set my prices at an amount that doesn’t assume my customers are assholes. I’m not going to overcharge people who enjoy an espresso because someone else has decided to be a jackass. I just fire the jackass customer.

  9. Ken @ BMag

    1 May

    What a load of crap! “Free” milk at the condiment bar? What there’s just a cow standing there that you can grab the udder and squirt some milk in your cup? Does Real Simple think that no one actually paid for that, specifically the café owner? Sheesh, not even Simple Jack is that dumb.

  10. devil's advocate

    1 May

    times are tough, better a milk-greedy customer than no customer at all

    • Al

      2 May

      What? Don’t leave milk and cream out for a customer to add on their own. It’s that simple.

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