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Randal H. Bodom, our global party correspondent, has been in Maastricht for the last several weeks. He’s edging with excitement about the Sweet Fantasy Party brought to you by Natvia, which you can attend this Friday, June 24th, by purchasing tickets here.

Finally. I’ve just shaken off the last of my WBC Bogota espresso hangover and Here. We. Are. Week Huh??? of my Maastricht Manhunt, and the world is just beginning to arrive in Randy’s Netherlands. “You can just stick it right there, boys!” Oops, sorry, that was Kees Van Der Westen and his butch European crew, with a big old package to set for delivery.

So, Randy update: I found the perfect flat, the perfect boots, the perfect little Dutch coffee shop on the outskirts of town that serve the most delish li’l cakes, and now all I have to do is wait for Randy’s fantasies to come true. I’m just edging with excitement about the SWEET FANTASY PARTY following SCAE 2011… and ring a ding ding! They just called me with updates and the people at Natvia have thought of everything. Click through to find out all the juicy details…

• Guests receive little goth black balloon as their invite and must present this for entry. I love goths, but all the makeup makes me dizzy. Will that balloon just filled with helium, or…?
• Did we eat those mushrooms that make you teeny tiny? Because you’ll be entering a giant maze of enormous balloons that’ll create a fantasy jungle. I know. I know.
• Just as you stumble out of the jungle you’ll be bombarded with strange mythical fantasy creatures. Maybe just say no to that second Coffee Shop space cake, because these creatures will be trying to talk your ear off (or drag you away to gobble you up) all night long.
• Guests will enjoy signature cocktails and drinks made with Drambuie. Make mine a double.
• Give me a quarter profile with a drop jaw, honey, because the whole place is going to be littered with paparazzi. Oh those nasty paparazzi bastards, why do they have to crash all my parties? Why must they hound me at every turn, always demanding more, more, more from Randy? Well, they can have their pound of flesh – photograph me if you must, you vipers, just make sure you get my good side! Randy ALWAYS on the left.
• DJ’s Cheek to Cheek and Sticky Dojah will be playing disco hits from 2030.
• Finally, as if that wasn’t enough, there will be fire twirlers, scaring and delighting guests with death defying feats. If I make it out of this Sweet Fantasy Party in one piece, that’ll be the REAL death defying feat.

The whole thing sounds like my best nightmares, my darkest dreams, and my sweetest fantasies. I can’t wait. You just have to be there.