8 Hot Coffee Trends That Need To Chill In 2013

 
By 19 December 2012
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dillon2

Here are exactly eight coffee trends that we think should sashay away in 2013. We’re not saying that these things aren’t beautiful, or cute, or hella tight – it’s just that these trends were very 2012 – and for good reason! But 2013 should be a welcoming of unthought things, and a retirement of that which we so admired and appreciated from yesteryear. Like mustaches, skinny jeans, and plaid, let us say goodnight and farewell, and reflect together on the things that brought us joy (and consternation) in 2012:

8. Edison bulbs.

selvedge-aprone

7. Selvedge aprons.

 

french-press-press-pot

6. Hating on press pots.

5. Overhead shots of coffee on Instagram.

4. Overhead shots of empty demitasse cups.

3. Underdeveloped coffee.

2. Unbleached filters.

1. Kopi Luwak.

 
  • John Cohen says:

    Even as an online coffee retailer I found these to be hilarious. I am actually a big supporter of stopping overhead shots of coffee on IG as well! Let’s expand that to food shots on IG. Yeah? Who’s with me?

    Reply
  • Dean Johnson says:

    I’d rather identify my own children in a morgue than look at anymore of the stupid shit put out by “Draw”Coffee. Utter masturbatory bullshit.

    Reply
  • Malian Lahey says:

    How can you be against unbleached filters? I thought that was a permanent thing – way more eco conscious than bleached. That just throws the whole list into question. :-)

    Also this last commenter just used the f-word to put down DrawCoffee, which just shows the whole thing has gotten way out of hand.

    Reply
  • Dean Johnson says:

    you forgot the most important one of all – No more cringe inducing doodles on coffee filters. Truly fucking embarrassing!

    Reply
  • haters gonna hate
    grandmas gonna percolate

    Reply
  • chris tacy says:

    #8 – whatever
    #7 – also whatever (but agree about the vests. Hats are a nice way to get around health dept regulations and thus are protected).
    #6 – yes. the hating needs to stop.
    #5, #4 – fuck instagram
    #3 – YES PLEASE THANK GOD (note: please understand the different between light-roast and under-development, kthxby)
    #2 – fair
    #1 – PLEASE let it stop

    Reply
  • Llewelyn says:

    Hey #8…

    We definitely do not hate Stumptown, Four Barrel, Ritual, or Handsome, and it is baffling to us that you would get that from this article. We actually have longstanding partnerships or have collaborated extensively with all of those companies. Also there is no beef whatsoever with Mike White.

    Our website occasionally approaches specialty coffee with a parodic sensibility. Keep this in mind the next time we enrage you, and thanks for reading!

    Reply
  • Bitter says:

    Sounds like Sprudge is challenging the status quo. Some of these things have reached a saturation point. They’ve become cliche and it sounds to me that them Sprudgeheads are just calling it out…without naming names. No harm in that, right? If you disagree, sounds like you need to take a lesson in some good hearted humor or shut the hell up.

    Reply
  • joe says:

    okay, so to summarize this post: hate stumptown, hate four barrel/handsome, love four barrel, hate mike white, hate heart/ritual, hate some other stuff too.

    +1 to what john norton said.

    sprudge is such a joke.

    Reply
  • Brent says:

    I third Christopher.

    Let’s give edison bulbs one more year to shine.

    Everything else can go.

    Reply
  • john norton says:

    it almost worries me, how as soon as something reaches a critical mass enough to be recognized, then people think of themselves as better for being able to identify a phenomenon. Do you really find these things offensive? or is this just an attempt to proclaim your own further development by not only knowing about these things, but being over them? it reeks of the same stench i smell every time some square NYT reporter brushes off hipsters by referring to glasses and fixed gears. such pandering to stupidity is just lazy and cliche. not impressed.

    Reply
  • Jonathan says:

    I second Christopher on the aprons.
    Agreed on the rest.

    Reply
  • #3 ZING!

    Otherwise, More APRONS in 2013!

    Selvedge or not..

    Reply
  • Andrejja says:

    Agree! The vest, and all the hats and caps.

    Reply
  • Flex says:

    I, for one, think that the “barista vest” needs to go. Get real, guys. The only way a vest works is if it’s leather and it’s the only thing you’re wearing up there.

    Just one man’s opinion.

    Flex

    Reply
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